TWITTAAAAH!-Tweeting Your Way To Hell!

Twitter rubs me the wrong way. I understand the idea behind Twitter, and, based on the success of preceding services like Facebook’s status updates, the service is obviously one that’s in demand. However, there are a few facets of Twitter that simply make the service unattractive and downright ugly.

1. THE BASTARDIZATION OF
THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE.

I’m looking right at you, Rick Sanchez of CNN. Your lack of capitalization, usage of ‘u’ and ‘w’, and lack of appropriate punctuation bother and enrage me to no end. And he’s not the only one. If you want to see a reason why American children are growing up thinking words like ‘ur’ and ‘w/e’ are appropriate words to use in papers, look no further. I understand the hard-limits in Twitter, but that doesn’t mean you have to make yourself look uneducated and childish as a consequence. Have some common sense here and put forth some effort, there is absolutely no way you are Twittering so furiously you forget capitalization or simple grammatical rules.

2. FAST & FURIOUS
TWITTERS 24/7.

Twitter accounts, just like any blog, are severely hampered when good updates (i.e. important useful updates) are slammed and replaced by completely useless updates (i.e. an update about you clapping at a social event, or telling us when you sleep or wake up). There are simply some things that no one, even yourself, want to read about. And why dumb down your own microblog simply because you can fit “I’m in bed!!!” into an update?

3.THE LAZINESS FACTORY.

The one thing that bothers me about Twitter is that the hard-limit in space per entry simply allows companies to be lazy. Let’s take bands and music labels as an appropriate example. Just because it’s easier to post update news to Twitter rather than your own publicized website doesn’t mean you have to alienate 99% of your fanbase by only posting updates to Twitter. 30 Seconds to Mars is a great example of this. I don’t even see any news on their website about their new album titled ‘This is War’. And yet, the news has been broken (and updated upon) on Twitter in multiple entries. It’s absolutely a sad day when I have to go to microblogs rather than their own site to find the latest official news from a band. Laziness at its best.

The best way to summarize my frustration and confusion over Twitter is simply to recite a recent commercial for Sprint.

A father and son are on the porch of their home relaxing with the rest of the family. The father, sitting in a chair on his new Sprint mobile phone, is audibly narrating his typing: “I’m sitting on the patio”, responding to his son’s request that he “cools it with the Twitter updates”. The son in turn, responds, “I know you are”.